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It’s the new anthem for people that are involved in a narcissistic relationship. Selena Gomez’ “Lose You to Love Me.” Brilliant. If she wrote this song, then I know the dynamics of her relationship with Justin Bieber. This young girl did enough drugs to blow out her kidney. The pain. The unrelenting pain. Narcissists are toxic on a level that is hard to put into words. But if you’ve been there, you know. It’s insidious. It’s evil. You’ve never felt better and you’ll never feel worse. And here’s the kicker. It’s not their fault. They were so damaged as children that this is their defense mechanism. It can’t be fixed either. Anymore than you can “fix” a sociopath. It’s forever. The cure for you is to leave. To remove yourself. There is nothing else. And yet, you can’t stop thinking about them. They are so woven into your life, so intricately, you can’t ever eliminate their influence entirely. But you can heal. “I needed to hate you to love me.” Still…

Selena is a Cancer Sun. Already we know she is super sensitive and vulnerable to her emotions. Add to this her Moon as a focal planet. A focal planet by definition is a weak link. Your Moon is also your feelings — actually it’s Cancer’s ruler — in the sign of Aries which sounds pretty stable. But no. If it couldn’t get worse, Selena has a Grand Square — a pretty rare configuration which involves her Mercury (verbally abusive), Venus (nobody loves me), Mars (I must have my way), Saturn (limitless ambition) and Pluto (it’s either very right or very wrong). Count them. That’s six focal planets. She’s a grand mess.

What’s amazing about Selena? She’s not dead. Currently she has predictive Sun square Mars. It doesn’t get harder than this. However Jupiter is conjunct her Venus. So a reprieve for now. The future? The roller coaster continues. Life is tough. There’s no celebrity exemption.

For a private consultation, contact melanie@xtrology.com. And please visit Xtrology on Facebook and Twitter. For Instagram, it’s xtrology_of_hollywood.

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